Inspiration and Encouragement for Strength and Happiness

Internet Dating: My Dates From Hell

Internet Dating: My Dates From Hell

By in Single Life | 0 comments

You’re tired of being single. What’s the best way to meet a man? Is internet dating the answer? Let’s face it. Life is busy. You haven’t got much time to go out socialising. You’re working or running a business. And you have other commitments eating into your time.

How are you supposed to meet him?

Looking for love on the internet is tempting. It’s easy.

You don’t have to leave the comfort of your home.

There are lots of single men online. And they’re looking to meet a gorgeous woman. Just like you.

Who knows. You could meet your Mr. Right on an internet dating site. Right?

How appealing…

Well, maybe or maybe not.

Before you sign up to that dating site, read what Mariama has to say. She searched reputable dating sites looking for a normal, honest man to date. Mariama’s online adventures were extraordinary. She documented her journey in a book, ‘Single Rarities. Her discovery about the men on dating sites was a shocking eye-opener.

This is what she said about her internet dating minefield…

Why did you write a book about your internet dating experiences?

When I shared my story, everyone would be cracking up. And I kept being told  to put it in a book. Because, people need to read and have a laugh. So, basically that’s where the idea came from. One day I was sitting down and I thought, you know what, I’m going to do it. I’m going to write a memoir, and I’m going to put all my dating disasters into the book. And let people share my experiences. Not just that in a kind of light-hearted way, but to warn women about the pitfalls of internet dating.

Why did you decide to go on the internet to meet a man?

I made that decision because one of my colleagues at work told me to do it. At the time she was using a dating site and she was getting really good responses. So she said why don’t I do it too. All the guys she met had money, really good jobs and big houses. She thought I could find my Mr. Perfect if I go online. So taking her advice, I went online and signed myself up to a few dating sites to see what would happen.

What did you discover about the men you met?

I discovered that most of  the men I met online had a secret motive. There was a hidden agenda behind all of them. For example, they want to know how much money you earn and if you own your home. These things to me are warning bells. If a man asks you these types of things, they want to know what they can gain from you.

So, I found it quite remarkable. They were really interested in what I had. But they wouldn’t tell me what they had. And as a single woman, I kind of find it off-putting. I didn’t want to invite someone over for dinner and 10 months later they’re still in my house.

I heard stories of people meeting men on the internet and telling the man they can come over. And then they can’t get the man out, you know. So I didn’t want to put myself in any of those positions.

Out of all the men that I met, I feel that a lot of them was trying to squeeze money out of me. Or they didn’t have a suitable fixed abode. They were trying to find somewhere to live.

Did you meet anyone that could have been a potential partner?

Out of all the dates I went on with the men I met on the internet, not one of them would have been a potential partner for me. No way. None of them had potential partner material. As I said, they were all looking for something, whether it was money, sex or somewhere to live.

 Would you recommend the internet dating route to other single women?

Personally, I wouldn’t recommend this type of dating route to any woman. I feel that you’re putting yourself in a  really vulnerable position. You don’t know who you’re going to meet. You don’t know if the person you’re meeting has told you lies. You don’t even know if there’s a rapport between the two of you. Having a rapport by writing is not the same as when you physically meet someone.

Also, the other thing I learned with internet dating, you could really start liking somebody by text. But when you meet them the chemistry is not there. So, I would say the traditional way of dating is the best way of dating.

You go out with your mate and you meet guys. I’m not saying the guys on the street are any better than the guys on the internet because they’re not. They’re exactly the same. But at least when you meet a man in the physical you kind of get an idea of what you’re getting, first of all. And number one, you know what he looks like. In addition, he’s not sending you pictures of what he looked like 20 years ago.

What did you learn from internet dating?

You first have to search through a pile of pooh before you get to something. There are so many men on the internet that would tell you everything you want to hear, jut to try to get to you. But like I said, 9 times out of 10 they’ve got a hidden agenda.

A lot of them online are also with other women. So, that’s another thing I learned about internet dating. They have women at home and they’re just looking for a bit of fun. Or they’re looking to gain from you.

I discovered something really interesting, though. When I go back online, just for the fun of it, obviously, not to date, the same men who were sitting there in 2012 are still sitting there, in 2015. Now the question you need to ask yourself is, “Why haven’t they met anyone? Why are they still sitting there three years later?” You really need to look into how long a man’s profile has been up. And look into the intentions of why they are online.

Find out what I went through during my internet dating experiences. I guarantee you will enjoy reading about my adventures. And the rare breed of men I met will amaze you. If you are in need of a good belly laugh, read my book ‘Single Rarities.

My name is Mariama Alawiye. I’m 42 years of age. I’m currently single. I live in Surrey. I own two businesses. I’m a part-time caterer. And I also help women with small businesses at Solutions For Business Women.

Over to you…

Have you got a successful story to share about internet dating? Or did you meet a man from hell on the internet? Please share your thoughts in the comment box below. 

June

About June

June Whittle is the founder of Miraculous Ladies, an author, freelance copywriter and professional blogger for hire. She works with small businesses, bloggers and individuals. She is also an author of a self-help and autobiography book “Deep Within my Soul: Hope after abuse”. Miraculous means extraordinary and Lady is a polite or formal way of referring to an amazing woman. That's you. You're a beautiful, strong, incredible, dynamic and powerful woman. Live your dreams. "If you can dream it, you can do it." ~ Walt Disney

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