I was a Victim of Abuse for a Reason
I am thankful for everything I go through. I suffered abuse during most of my relationships. I went through physical and emotional pain. My heart was broken many times. I didn’t understand why I ended up with abusers. But, years later (after I became single) it made sense. Everything you go through in life is for a reason. I strongly believe that.
That is why I give thanks for my toxic relationship experiences. If I didn’t go through it, I wouldn’t have a story to share with you.
On top of that, God healed my brokenness 100% and restored my life.
My Abuse story
My journey into abuse started with my first love. He was also a serial cheater (addicted to other women).
One night at a party his dark side surfaced. His jealousy peaked because I danced with a male friend. After the party ended, we were alone in the room at my friend’s house. He came up to me angrily, grabbed hold of my neck and squeezed hard. While he was squeezing the life out of me he yelled, “If I can’t have you, no one else will.” Thank God, my friend was nearby. She saved my life.
He was the type of man who did what he wanted, regardless of how I felt. He expected me to accept him being unfaithful. His ritual was to date other women, one after the other. And so, we had endless arguments and fights.
Writing poems helped with the frustration
My escape from the mental torture was writing poems. It was my healing therapy and the best outlet for me. I would have gone mad if I bottled up the frustration and hurt inside. I had to find a way to release it.
Over the years, I wrote many poems. Every time the tears poured and my heart was crushed, I created a poem.
I am in the process of putting my poems in a book titled ‘Deep Within My Soul‘. The book also includes a little about my journey and how the abuse affected me.
The future of this blog and how I want to help you
This month is my blog’s birthday. Miraculous Ladies is four years old.
I’ve been feeling restless about the future of Miraculous Ladies. After a lot of thinking, praying and more thinking it dawned on me. I created this blog to inspire, motivate, educate and entertain. I want to use it to add value to your life.
One way of doing that is to share my story. That’s only the start. I intend to write articles to help with your personal development. I know when you’ve left an abusive partner it also leaves you damaged…
- Your self-confidence hits rock bottom.
- You doubt your abilities.
- You feel like rubbish, sometimes.
- You feel depressed.
- You feel embarrassed.
- You feel humiliated.
- You blame yourself. Although I will put my hand up and admit in my case I was to blame at times. I defended myself. Nevertheless, it’s not acceptable for a man to lash out and hit you. Nor is it right for them to cheat on you.
There is a good quality of life on the other side of abuse.
Abuse is a massive subject and I don’t have all the answers. Nor am I trained or have any professional knowledge in this area. But I do have experience because I lived with it for many, many years.
Added to that, I’m here to inspire and encourage you to be strong, powerful and appreciate your inner and outer beauty. It will start with my new book which will have useful resources such as organisations and books to help you recover your life. You are valuable. You are precious. You are worth more than you’ve settled for. You deserve real love and appreciation. But, the best and most important love comes from you, for yourself.
“Don’t forget to love yourself.” ~ Soren Kierkegaard
I need your help
I would also like to share your story on this blog if you’ve been a victim of abuse in your relationship. It will motivate other women
Many women are suffering in silence for lots of different reasons. If you have children, it’s harder to walk out of a marriage or relationship. I was in that place once. However, I had to make a bold decision one day because of my sanity. In addition, it wasn’t healthy for my children to see fights and listen to endless arguments. One of my daughters started smoking because of the stress of living in that environment. She was only 12. I had to leave for their sake.
At times, it felt like I had been to hell and back. I’m sharing my story about abuse because it could inspire someone else not to give up.
Over to you…
Have you run away from an abusive relationship? Would you share your story on this blog? Please leave your thoughts in the comments box below. 🙂