Are You Hungry for a Man?
A comment I read on blog which said, “Going into a relationship because you’re lonely is like going grocery shopping while you’re hungry,” inspired me to write this article.
I don’t know about you, but when I go shopping hungry, I pack my trolley with food that I wouldn’t usually buy. It’s like I’m sending a message to my subconscious mind telling it that the food in my trolley will compensate for my hunger. You’re probably thinking, ‘So what’s that go to do with being hungry for a man?’
Hunger pangs for a man
Well… Loneliness can create a deep hunger for a man. Many years ago I didn’t know how to deal with loneliness or even how to enjoy my company. I hated being alone. I would get miserable and depressed if I didn’t have a man in my life.
I needed someone to love me, tell me that I look beautiful (because of my insecurities) and give me emotional support. I craved for encouragement after a bad day at work. But most importantly, knowing that I had a man who I could call MY OWN!
To satisfy that hunger and fix the craving, as soon as one relationship ended, I would be searching for the next man. I had to fill that hunger pang or void in my life.
Can he really fill you up?
I was like a chocolate addict looking for a quick fix. But you can’t treat men like eating a Cadbury’s fruit and nut bar. Because, as soon as the chocolate finishes, you want more.
Men have feelings! If you choose the wrong one for the wrong reasons, you’ll eventually get more than heartburn.
There are a lot of things to consider when going into a relationship. If you go into one without laying a strong foundation, it will eventually crumble.
Maybe all you want is a fling. But having lots of casual relationships will not fill the deep hunger within.
In the short-term you’re excited by having a new man in your life. But long-term, you will crave for more than that.
I was in a ‘casual’ relationship once. It was like eating a packet of crisp when you’re hungry. It doesn’t quite fill you up. The relationship was great for the first year or so. After that I wanted more because I wasn’t satisfied. But it wasn’t going anywhere. So, I ended it and was back to being lonely all over again.
Being hungry and sampling the wrong man can leave a bad taste in your mouth. Have you ever eaten a delicious meal and chosen a dessert that looked nice but tasted nasty?
If you choose in a hurry, for instant gratification, you could find yourself with a violent, abusive man. All because you were lonely and wanted to satisfy your emotional hunger.
My dad had a wise quote for me. When I asked his advice about men and relationships he said, “Don’t jump from the frying pan into the fire!” You might feel like you’re in the frying pan because loneliness is driving you mad. But it’s more dangerous to jump into the fire in search of ‘I want a man now!’
Deal with being hungry for a man
Enjoy your singleness. Use that time to invest in yourself, add value to your life and prepare yourself for when you do meet the right man.
There’s nothing wrong with being hungry for a man. You just have to know how to deal with it and exercise self-discipline while you wait.
Why settle for prawns when you can have a lobster?
Photo by Naito8