Inspiration, Encouragement and Happiness for Strong Women

Are Your Words Like a knife in Someone’s Back?

Are Your Words Like a knife in Someone’s Back?

By in Relationships | 5 comments

  • SumoMe

 “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me.” Words do hurt and can hurt quite deeply. Destructive, nasty words can stay buried in your memories for many years. When were the last times someone said kind, uplifting words to motivate or comfort you? On the other hand, when were hateful, degrading words spoken to you? How did those words affect you? Words can curse, and they can bless.

Name calling

Children are vulnerable to hurtful words. Demeaning words can have a damaging impact on their lives. When you batter negative words such as, “you’re stupid, you’re useless, I hate you, I wish you were never born,” into their heads: is that not like putting a knife in their backs? Those are curse words that could turn them into emotionally broken people.

A little girl parted from her parents when she was four years old. They went to live in another country, and her grandmother raised her. She was a shy, insecure child. She suffered from a lot of illnesses. Therefore, she was underweight and really skinny. Her family made fun of her weight and constantly teased her about her size. The “name calling” made her feel insecure about her body.

When she was 12, her friends started developing breasts. Each day she excitedly looked at her own breast and waited for them to get bigger. Months went by, but they didn’t grow much beyond two buds. Her friends sniggered when she wore swimming costumes. They commented that her breasts were as flat as a pancake. They used mocking words to describe her breasts and named them “two fried eggs.” The never-ending name callings deepened her lack of self-confidence. She felt like a boy in a girl’s body.

Two years later her other grandmother came back from abroad. She decided that this girl should live with her. Her gran took her away. They travelled to another country.

She met her mum and dad for the first time since she was four. They were like strangers to her. She hated the new country and pined for her homeland.

The children in her new school didn’t like her. She was different to them and spoke a foreign language. They teased her skinniness. They named her remarkably long legs, “leg’s eleven” because they were so thin.

When she walked to the shops alone, the white boys bullied her on the streets. They yelled, “Go back to your country monkey! We don’t need your sort here.” She felt like running away, but she went home instead, locked herself in her bedroom and cried. She was so unhappy.

Her mum and dad were always arguing and shouting at each other. She overheard her mum one evening. She angrily screamed at her dad, “I never loved you. I only married you because I was pregnant with your child, who I didn’t even want. She was a bad mistake that ruined my life.” Unkind words rang in her ears again. She wanted to curl up and die.

Damaging, knife cutting words

When she became an adult and got married, the name calling continued. Her ex-husband barked at her in fits of rage. “You’re useless. You don’t even know how to be a proper mother to your kids. Look at your moody face! Why don’t you fix yourself up you b….?” He even insulted her about her past relationships.

The name calling continued for years. Her anger towards him turned into bitterness. One day she released her suppressed voice. It was just as nasty as his. They frequently tossed aggressive words, undignified words, spiteful and threatening words at each other like darts towards a board.

During one of their destructive words slinging matches one day, she angrily screamed, “I wish you were dead!” The words came rushing out of her mouth. She couldn’t take them back. It was too late.

Four years later, he died. Her words didn’t kill him. However, the guilt of those vicious words she yelled at him will live with her for the rest of her life.

Words can build up or words can tear down. Be quick to listen and slow to speak. Words said in anger or even jokingly can have a lasting negative effect. Don’t use your words to destroy someone’s life. Use kind words to show love and affection and to build up.     

Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.” Proverbs 18:21.

If you found this article useful, please click the Facebook share and Twitter button below to share it with friends.

 

 

Photo credit: Dan

June

About June

June Whittle is the founder of Miraculous Ladies, an author, freelance copywriter and professional blogger for hire. She works with small businesses, bloggers and individuals. She is also an author of a self-help and autobiography book “Deep Within my Soul: Hope after abuse”. Miraculous means extraordinary and Lady is a polite or formal way of referring to an amazing woman. That's you. You're a beautiful, strong, incredible, dynamic and powerful woman. Live your dreams. "If you can dream it, you can do it." ~ Walt Disney

    5 Comments

  1. This blog was the first I?ve found on my search and I don?t need to look further. This is the exact information I need and I hope to read more about this soon! Thanks!

    Buy Autodesk Softimage 2011 x32

    29/10/2011

    • You’re welcome. It’s good to be able to provide information that is of use to others. Thanks for your comments.

      junie junie

      29/10/2011

  2. Hi! This is my 1st comment here so I just wanted to give a quick shout out and tell you I genuinely enjoy reading through your posts. Can you recommend any other blogs/websites/forums that go over the same topics? Thanks a ton!

    Web design Philadelphia

    09/11/2011

    • I appreciate your comments. I don’t know of any other websites that you can get the same information from. Maybe if you google, you’ll find something.

      junie junie

      13/11/2011

  3. Good site. My thanks for posting this. I’ll definitely come back to see what’s new and tell my coworkers about you.

    hcg cream diet

    03/05/2013

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. 5 Lies that can Destroy Your Self- Confidence | Miraculous Ladies - [...] if you lack self-confidence, other people’s words can have a negative effect on your life. And whatever confidence you…
  2. How A Single Mother Can Rise Above The Storms Of Life » Arise Single Christian Mummies - [...] careful about the types of language you use in front of your children. Otherwise they’ll repeat it to friends…
  3. Be Sensitive | Miraculous Ladies - [...] way they’d like to be treated. I also told them that I wouldn’t tolerate any type of name-calling in…

Post a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge

© 2011-2017 miraculousladies.com All Rights Reserved

error: Content is protected !!
%d bloggers like this: